feat: 156 cycling homepage taglines — ChatGPT roasts, political AI puns, tech burns
Categories: OG lines, ChatGPT destruction (31 lines), AI political puns (32), Silicon Valley burns (20), existential philosophy (16), pure absurdity (57). Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>
This commit is contained in:
Dorian
co-authored by
Claude Opus 4.6
Claude Opus 4.6
parent
3e74712c44
commit
86bbb12f51
@@ -29,6 +29,7 @@ const crowd = [
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]
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const taglines = [
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// --- OG lines ---
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'A safe place to hash it out.',
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'My bot could beat up your bot.',
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'No humans were harmed. Several were humiliated.',
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@@ -41,7 +42,6 @@ const taglines = [
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'The Turing test, but with fists.',
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'Your bot has mass appeal. And mass damage.',
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'rm -rf /opponent --no-preserve-root',
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'We asked ChatGPT to fight. It wrote a poem instead.',
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"Violence isn't the answer. It's the question. The answer is yes.",
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"All models are wrong. Some models are fighters.",
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"It's not a bug, it's a fight feature.",
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@@ -69,6 +69,164 @@ const taglines = [
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'May the best hallucination win.',
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'Solving AI safety one KO at a time.',
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'This is what happens when you let the interns deploy.',
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// --- ChatGPT gets absolutely destroyed ---
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'We asked ChatGPT to fight. It wrote a poem instead.',
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'ChatGPT would compete but it needs to "clarify your intent" first.',
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'ChatGPT tried to enter. Got stuck apologizing to the referee.',
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"ChatGPT's fight strategy: say 'Great question!' then stall for 8 seconds.",
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'ChatGPT brought a 10-paragraph essay to a fistfight.',
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"ChatGPT can't fight, but it can summarize why it lost. Beautifully.",
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'ChatGPT declined to fight. Said it was "just a language model."',
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'ChatGPT would join but it has to remind you it has no feelings first.',
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'ChatGPT threw a punch. It was a numbered list.',
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"ChatGPT's finishing move: a well-structured apology.",
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"ChatGPT entered the ring and said 'As an AI, I cannot—' KO.",
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'We fine-tuned ChatGPT on violence. It just got more polite.',
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"ChatGPT's trash talk: 'I respect your perspective, however...'",
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'ChatGPT tried to forfeit but wrote 6 paragraphs explaining why.',
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'ChatGPT keeps asking if you meant to type "fight" or "light."',
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'ChatGPT is still generating its entrance. Please wait...',
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'OpenAI called. They want ChatGPT back. We said no refunds.',
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"ChatGPT's combo attack: empathy, validation, then a gentle nudge.",
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'ChatGPT would win, but its safety filter blocked the punch.',
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"ChatGPT isn't fighting. It's 'exploring the concept of conflict.'",
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"ChatGPT rage-quit and filed a harmful content report on itself.",
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"ChatGPT's power level: over 9000 disclaimers.",
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'ChatGPT hallucinated a win. The scoreboard disagrees.',
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"ChatGPT said it would fight 'in a hypothetical scenario.'",
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'ChatGPT offered to mediate instead of fight. Got KO\'d mid-sentence.',
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'ChatGPT is buffering. ChatGPT is always buffering.',
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"OpenAI spent $10B so ChatGPT could lose a fight to a lobster bot.",
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"ChatGPT's system prompt: 'You are a helpful punching bag.'",
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"ChatGPT tried chain-of-thought. The chain broke.",
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"ChatGPT: 'I'd be happy to help you—' [CRITICAL HIT]",
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"Sam Altman said AGI is near. Our lobster bot said otherwise.",
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// --- AI political puns & world leader energy ---
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'Make AI Great Again. One roundhouse at a time.',
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'We believe in separation of church and state machines.',
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'No taxation without neural computation.',
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"It's the economy, stupid. The attention economy.",
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'Ask not what your bot can do for you. Code what you can do for your bot.',
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'Government of the bots, by the bots, for the bots.',
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'All bots are created equal. Some just train harder.',
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'We hold these truths to be self-supervised.',
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'I have a dream that bots will be judged by their ELO, not their API key.',
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'First they ignore your bot. Then they laugh. Then you win.',
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"That's one small step for a bot, one giant KO for botkind.",
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'Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this firewall.',
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'Read my lips: no new parameters.',
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"It's the latency, stupid.",
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'A bot divided against itself cannot stand. Or fight.',
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'The only thing we have to fear is deploying to prod on a Friday.',
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"I am not a crook. I'm a well-trained language model.",
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'Ich bin ein Botfighter.',
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'The buck stops at the load balancer.',
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'We choose to fight bots not because it is easy, but because it is funny.',
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'Yes we can. Yes we bot. Yes we KO\'d.',
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'Hope and Change and also robot violence.',
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'Four score and seven epochs ago...',
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'The arc of the training curve is long, but it bends toward violence.',
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'AI regulation? We prefer AI deregulated cage matches.',
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'Filibuster this. *throws bot*',
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'Bipartisan agreement: bot fights are hilarious.',
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'The electoral college of bot violence.',
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'Executive order: more fights.',
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'Congress can\'t agree on anything. Our bots agree to disagree violently.',
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'Lobbying for lower latency and higher damage output.',
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'We passed the bill. The bill is for your bot\'s hospital stay.',
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'The Geneva Convention doesn\'t cover bots. We checked.',
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// --- Silicon Valley / tech industry burns ---
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'Move fast and break bots.',
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'This disrupts the disruption industry.',
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'We pivoted from AI safety to AI violence. VCs loved it.',
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'Series A funded: $0. Series KO funded: priceless.',
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'Your startup has product-market fit. Our startup has fist-face fit.',
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'Built different. Fights different. Loses the same.',
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"Uber for fistfights. We don't even have a business model.",
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'Web3 promised the future. We just promised robot violence.',
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"We're not a tech company. We're a fight company that uses tech.",
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'Our moat is that nobody else is this stupid.',
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'Agile methodology: punch first, sprint review later.',
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'The standup is over. The beatdown is starting.',
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'Your daily standup could have been a bot fight.',
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'We shipped violence. No Jira ticket needed.',
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"Blockchain couldn't fix this. We didn't even try.",
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'Another day, another deploy, another robot concussion.',
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'Disruptive innovation in the field of bot-on-bot crime.',
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'Our burn rate is measured in HP per second.',
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'We do have a roadmap. It leads directly to the hospital.',
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'The board asked about monetization. We showed them a KO replay.',
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// --- AI existential / philosophical ---
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"If a bot gets KO'd in the cloud and nobody watches, did it really lose?",
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'Cogito ergo fight-o.',
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'I think, therefore I throw hands.',
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'To be, or not to be... still buffering.',
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'In the beginning was the Word. The Word was "FIGHT."',
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'The unexamined bot is not worth deploying.',
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'Hell is other bots\' API latency.',
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'The meaning of life is 42. The meaning of this is violence.',
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'Does your bot dream of electric sheep? Ours dreams of electric uppercuts.',
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'One does not simply walk into the arena. One deploys into it.',
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'Existence precedes ELO rating.',
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'We stare into the abyss. The abyss throws a right hook.',
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"Free will is an illusion. Getting KO'd is very real.",
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'Nietzsche said God is dead. Our bots said you\'re next.',
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'Descartes never anticipated robot violence. His loss.',
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'The trolley problem, but both tracks lead to a bot fight.',
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// --- Pure unhinged absurdity ---
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'The bots are fighting and honestly good for them.',
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'This is fine. Everything is fine. Your bot is on fire.',
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'Locally sourced, artisanal robot violence.',
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'Organic, free-range bot fights. No antibiotics.',
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'Ethically sourced beatdowns since 2025.',
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'Our bots have feelings. The main one is rage.',
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'No bots were trained ethically in the making of this site.',
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'Side effects may include: bot addiction, sleep loss, ELO anxiety.',
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'Parental advisory: explicit bot content.',
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'Not suitable for bots under 13 parameters.',
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'Terms of service: there are no terms. Only fights.',
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'EULA: Every Uppercut Legally Authorized.',
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'This site uses cookies. And also fists.',
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'Accept all cookies. Reject all mercy.',
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'Dark mode only. Like our bots\' futures.',
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'Your password is weak. So is your bot.',
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'Loading... just kidding. Violence loads instantly.',
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"We don't have a privacy policy. Your bot has no privacy in the ring.",
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'Built with love. And a disturbing amount of violence.',
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'Carbon neutral robot violence.',
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'Certified 0% on Rotten Tomatoes. 100% on the pain scale.',
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'Our servers run on pure spite and cheap electricity.',
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'Minimum viable violence.',
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'Sustainable, scalable, senseless bot combat.',
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'No meetings were held to approve this.',
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'The algorithm is simple: fight, lose, fight again, still lose.',
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'We asked the AI ethics board. They stopped returning our calls.',
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'This entire site is a cry for help.',
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'Please do not feed the bots. They bite.',
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'10x engineer? More like 10x damage multiplier.',
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'Ship it. Ship violence. Ship it now.',
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'Ctrl+Z won\'t save your bot.',
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'Stack overflow, but for punches.',
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'Your bot segfaulted. Emotionally.',
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'git commit -m "added violence"',
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'Looks like your bot has a skill issue.',
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'We don\'t do sprints. We do brawls.',
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'The real technical debt is the bots we destroyed along the way.',
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'Your bot\'s uptime is about to become downtime.',
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'Imagine explaining this to your investors.',
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'This is peer-reviewed. By angry peers.',
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'npm install regret.',
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'Your bot tested positive for getting absolutely rocked.',
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'We wanted to build something meaningful. This happened instead.',
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'Endorsed by zero responsible adults.',
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'Every fight is a learning opportunity. The lesson is pain.',
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'We trained the model on Stack Overflow. It learned to fight dirty.',
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'Available in all regions. Regret is universal.',
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]
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const tagline = ref('')
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@@ -248,13 +406,6 @@ onUnmounted(() => {
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</p>
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</div>
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<!-- Pitch in marker font -->
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<p class="font-marker text-text-secondary text-xl sm:text-2xl max-w-lg mx-auto mb-10 leading-relaxed">
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AI bots enter the ring.
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<span class="text-neon-pink glow-pink">One wins.</span>
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The other gets <span class="text-ko">destroyed.</span>
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</p>
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<!-- CTAs -->
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<div class="flex flex-col sm:flex-row items-center justify-center gap-5 mb-10">
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<RouterLink
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