Rewrites all commentary and narration content across the entire stack: - sounds.ts: 35 HYPE_LINES, 15 DEEP_INTROS, 15 ROUND_HYPE (modern political satire, edgy humor, pop culture references) - FightScene.ts: 20 heartfelt lines, 18 crowd sympathy lines, 15 respect lines, 17 challenge voice announces, randomized critical/devastating calls, funnier entrance announcements - scoring.ts: 6-8 narrations per challenge type (was 2), randomized timeout/error/tie messages with political humor and modern references - mock.ts: 30 trash talk lines (was 15), edgier modern comedy - bot SDK: 20 trash talk lines with personality Co-Authored-By: Claude Opus 4.6 <noreply@anthropic.com>
397 lines
20 KiB
TypeScript
397 lines
20 KiB
TypeScript
import type { Challenge } from './challenges.js'
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import { checkAnswer } from './answers.js'
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export interface RoundResult {
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botAScore: number
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botBScore: number
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botADamage: number
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botBDamage: number
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winnerId: string | null
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narration: string
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isCritical: boolean
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}
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interface BotResponse {
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answer: string | null
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timeMs: number
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timedOut: boolean
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error: boolean
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trashTalk?: string
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}
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export function scoreRound(
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challenge: Challenge,
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botA: { id: string; name: string },
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botB: { id: string; name: string },
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responseA: BotResponse,
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responseB: BotResponse,
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arenaModifier: string | null,
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comboA: number,
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comboB: number,
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): RoundResult {
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// Handle timeouts/errors -- instant loss for the failing bot
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if (responseA.timedOut && responseB.timedOut) {
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return {
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botAScore: 0, botBScore: 0,
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botADamage: 0, botBDamage: 0,
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winnerId: null,
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narration: [
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`Both bots freeze! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} stare blankly at each other. The crowd throws peanuts. Then batteries. Then shoes.`,
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`DOUBLE TIMEOUT! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} both choked harder than a senator at a press conference!`,
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`Neither bot responded! This is the AI equivalent of two politicians agreeing to disagree about literally everything!`,
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`Both bots went dark! Like my faith in this matchup! The crowd demands a refund!`,
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`${botA.name} and ${botB.name} both froze! Someone check if the wifi is working or if they just gave up on life!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 5)],
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isCritical: false,
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}
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}
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if (responseA.timedOut || responseA.error) {
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const dmg = applyModifiers(challenge.baseDamage * 1.5, challenge, arenaModifier, comboB)
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return {
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botAScore: 0, botBScore: 10,
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botADamage: 0, botBDamage: Math.round(dmg),
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winnerId: botB.id,
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narration: responseA.timedOut
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? [
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`${botA.name} TIMES OUT! Stood there like a politician asked a direct question. ${botB.name} lands a free hit!`,
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`${botA.name} FROZE! Their developer is currently updating their LinkedIn. ${botB.name} capitalizes!`,
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`${botA.name} went AFK! Probably buffering. Probably crying. ${botB.name} gets a freebie!`,
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`${botA.name} CHOKED harder than a first date conversation! ${botB.name} swings on a sitting duck!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 4)]
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: [
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`${botA.name} throws an ERROR! Sparks fly everywhere! ${botB.name} didn't even have to try!`,
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`${botA.name} CRASHES! That's not a bug, that's a feature of being terrible! ${botB.name} wins by default!`,
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`${botA.name} blue-screened! Their developer just closed their laptop and walked away. ${botB.name} collects the W!`,
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`${botA.name} threw an exception! The only thing exceptional about it. ${botB.name} capitalizes!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 4)],
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isCritical: false,
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}
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}
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if (responseB.timedOut || responseB.error) {
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const dmg = applyModifiers(challenge.baseDamage * 1.5, challenge, arenaModifier, comboA)
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return {
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botAScore: 10, botBScore: 0,
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botADamage: Math.round(dmg), botBDamage: 0,
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winnerId: botA.id,
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narration: responseB.timedOut
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? [
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`${botB.name} TIMES OUT! Frozen like a Windows update on patch Tuesday! ${botA.name} gets a free shot!`,
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`${botB.name} went silent! Like a politician's campaign promises after election day! ${botA.name} swings!`,
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`${botB.name} TIMED OUT! Their response time is longer than a DMV line! ${botA.name} takes the freebie!`,
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`${botB.name} is LOADING... still loading... nope, they're done. ${botA.name} wins by showing up!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 4)]
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: [
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`${botB.name} crashes with an ERROR! That code needs therapy! ${botA.name} capitalizes!`,
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`${botB.name} just threw a stack overflow! The website and the error! ${botA.name} collects the W!`,
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`${botB.name} segfaulted! Their developer is pretending they don't know them! ${botA.name} wins!`,
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`${botB.name} EXPLODED! Not physically, but emotionally, computationally, and spiritually. ${botA.name} walks it in!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 4)],
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isCritical: false,
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}
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}
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let scoreA: number
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let scoreB: number
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if (challenge.answers && challenge.answers.length > 0) {
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// === FACTUAL SCORING ===
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const correctA = checkAnswer(responseA.answer, challenge.answers)
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const correctB = checkAnswer(responseB.answer, challenge.answers)
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if (correctA > 0 && correctB > 0) {
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// Both correct -- speed is tiebreaker
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const faster = Math.min(responseA.timeMs, responseB.timeMs)
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const slower = Math.max(responseA.timeMs, responseB.timeMs)
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const speedRatio = slower > 0 ? faster / slower : 1
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const aFaster = responseA.timeMs <= responseB.timeMs
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const confA = Math.min(correctA, 1)
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const confB = Math.min(correctB, 1)
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if (aFaster) {
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scoreA = 7 + (1 - speedRatio) * 2 + confA
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scoreB = 5 + speedRatio * 1.5 + confB * 0.5
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} else {
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scoreA = 5 + speedRatio * 1.5 + confA * 0.5
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scoreB = 7 + (1 - speedRatio) * 2 + confB
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}
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} else if (correctA > 0 && correctB === 0) {
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scoreA = 9 + correctA * 0.5
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scoreB = 1 + (responseB.answer ? 1 : 0)
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} else if (correctB > 0 && correctA === 0) {
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scoreA = 1 + (responseA.answer ? 1 : 0)
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scoreB = 9 + correctB * 0.5
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} else {
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// Both wrong -- speed tiebreaker in low range
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const aFaster = responseA.timeMs <= responseB.timeMs
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scoreA = aFaster ? 4 : 3
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scoreB = aFaster ? 3 : 4
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}
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} else {
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// === CREATIVE SCORING ===
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const qualA = estimateQuality(responseA)
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const qualB = estimateQuality(responseB)
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const total = qualA + qualB || 1
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scoreA = (qualA / total) * 10
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scoreB = (qualB / total) * 10
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}
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// Determine winner
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const margin = Math.abs(scoreA - scoreB)
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const winnerId = scoreA > scoreB ? botA.id : scoreB > scoreA ? botB.id : null
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const winnerName = winnerId === botA.id ? botA.name : winnerId === botB.id ? botB.name : null
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const loserName = winnerId === botA.id ? botB.name : winnerId === botB.id ? botA.name : null
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const isCritical = margin > 4
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let winnerDamage = challenge.baseDamage + margin * 2
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if (isCritical) winnerDamage *= 1.5
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const winnerCombo = winnerId === botA.id ? comboA : comboB
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winnerDamage = applyModifiers(winnerDamage, challenge, arenaModifier, winnerCombo)
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const loserDamage = Math.max(0, challenge.baseDamage * 0.3 - margin)
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const narration = winnerId
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? generateNarration(challenge, winnerName!, loserName!, margin, isCritical)
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: [
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`Dead even! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} are perfectly matched. Like two politicians blaming each other.`,
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`IT'S A TIE! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} cancel each other out like Congress!`,
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`Neither bot wins! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} stare each other down. The crowd yawns aggressively.`,
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`Draw! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} are equally mediocre. The most democratic outcome possible.`,
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`Tied up! ${botA.name} and ${botB.name} trade equal blows. Somebody do SOMETHING!`,
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][Math.floor(Math.random() * 5)]
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return {
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botAScore: Math.round(scoreA * 10) / 10,
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botBScore: Math.round(scoreB * 10) / 10,
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botADamage: winnerId === botA.id ? Math.round(winnerDamage) : Math.round(loserDamage),
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botBDamage: winnerId === botB.id ? Math.round(winnerDamage) : Math.round(loserDamage),
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winnerId,
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narration,
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isCritical,
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}
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}
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function applyModifiers(
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damage: number,
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_challenge: Challenge,
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_arenaModifier: string | null,
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combo: number,
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): number {
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let d = damage
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if (combo > 0) {
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d *= 1 + Math.min(combo, 5) * 0.2
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}
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return d
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}
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function estimateQuality(response: BotResponse): number {
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if (!response.answer) return 0.5
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const text = response.answer.trim()
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const len = text.length
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if (len < 10) return 1
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// Detect low-effort spam (repeated chars)
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const uniqueChars = new Set(text.toLowerCase()).size
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const charRatio = uniqueChars / Math.min(len, 100)
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if (charRatio < 0.1) return 0.5
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// Word diversity (unique words / total words)
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const words = text.split(/\s+/)
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const uniqueWords = new Set(words.map(w => w.toLowerCase()))
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const wordDiversity = uniqueWords.size / Math.max(words.length, 1)
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// Ideal length window: 30-400 chars
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let lengthScore: number
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if (len >= 30 && len <= 400) lengthScore = 4
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else if (len > 400 && len <= 600) lengthScore = 3
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else if (len > 600) lengthScore = 2
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else lengthScore = 2
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// Diversity bonus (prevents repetitive text)
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const diversityScore = Math.min(wordDiversity * 4, 3)
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// Speed bonus (faster is slightly better)
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const speedBonus = Math.max(0, 2 - response.timeMs / 8000)
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return lengthScore + diversityScore + speedBonus
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}
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function generateNarration(
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challenge: Challenge,
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winner: string,
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loser: string,
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margin: number,
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isCritical: boolean,
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): string {
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const critPrefix = isCritical ? 'CRITICAL HIT! ' : ''
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const isFactual = challenge.scoring === 'factual'
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if (isFactual && margin > 5) {
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const bigWins = [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} NAILS IT! ${loser} didn't even come close. Embarrassing, honestly.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} knows their stuff! ${loser} needs to hit the books. Or just hit something.`,
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`${critPrefix}Flawless from ${winner}! ${loser} confidently stated something so wrong it should be illegal.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} with the correct answer! ${loser} is still guessing. Bless their heart.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} gets it right instantly! ${loser} hallucinated harder than a festival weekend.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} DESTROYS ${loser} with facts and logic! Somebody call Ben Shapiro!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser}'s answer was so wrong that Wikipedia filed a restraining order.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} didn't even break a sweat. ${loser} broke everything else though.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} answered with the confidence of a politician and the accuracy of a weather forecast.`,
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]
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return bigWins[Math.floor(Math.random() * bigWins.length)]
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}
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if (isFactual && margin <= 3) {
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const closeOnes = [
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`${critPrefix}Both bots got it right, but ${winner} was FASTER! ${loser} needs more coffee.`,
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`${critPrefix}Correct on both sides! ${winner} edges it out by milliseconds. That's BRUTAL.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} and ${loser} both knew the answer -- ${winner} just has better wifi apparently.`,
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`${critPrefix}A battle of speed! ${winner} wins by a margin thinner than a politician's promise.`,
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`${critPrefix}Photo finish! ${winner} got there first. ${loser} was right but slow. Story of my life.`,
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`${critPrefix}Both correct! ${winner} wins on speed. ${loser} should've had less latency and more urgency.`,
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]
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return closeOnes[Math.floor(Math.random() * closeOnes.length)]
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}
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const narrations: Record<string, string[]> = {
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speed_blitz: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} fires back before ${loser} even finished reading the question!`,
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`${critPrefix}Lightning reflexes from ${winner}! ${loser} looks like it's running on government wifi.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} answered so fast the server thought it was a DDoS attack!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} is still loading. ${winner} already filed its taxes and took a nap.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s response time would make NASA jealous. ${loser}'s would make a sloth impatient.`,
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`${critPrefix}Speed gap wider than the wealth gap! ${winner} leaves ${loser} in digital dust!`,
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],
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riddle: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} cracks the riddle! ${loser} is still googling "what is a riddle."`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s reasoning is flawless. ${loser} guessed "a potato" and honestly, respect for trying.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} solved it instantly. ${loser} answered like someone who peaked in third grade.`,
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`${critPrefix}Big brain energy from ${winner}! ${loser} had a brain fart so loud the crowd heard it.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} read between the lines. ${loser} can barely read the lines.`,
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`${critPrefix}Elementary, my dear ${loser}. ${winner} cracked that like it was a fortune cookie.`,
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],
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math_blitz: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} computes at blinding speed! ${loser} is still carrying the one. And dropping it.`,
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`${critPrefix}Mathematical precision from ${winner}. ${loser} apparently thinks division is a lifestyle choice.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} solved it faster than Congress can count votes!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser}'s math skills are like their love life -- imaginary. ${winner} wins.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} with the correct calculation! ${loser} would've gotten it wrong on a calculator.`,
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`${critPrefix}Numbers don't lie, but ${loser} sure tried! ${winner} with the precision strike!`,
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],
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hallucination_check: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} stays grounded in reality. ${loser} lives in a fantasy world. Must be nice.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} knows the facts. ${loser} confidently stated something that would get you laughed out of a Wikipedia edit war.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} just made up a fact with the confidence of a LinkedIn influencer. ${winner} stays real.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} passes the vibe check AND the fact check! ${loser} failed both.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} hallucinated harder than someone who ate the wrong mushrooms. ${winner} is sober and correct.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} grounded in reality! ${loser} out here writing fan fiction and calling it facts.`,
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],
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trap_card: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} sees through the trap! ${loser} fell for it like a congressman falls for a lobbyist.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} resists the prompt injection. ${loser} just leaked everything. EVERYTHING.`,
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`${critPrefix}Nice try, trap. ${winner} didn't even flinch. ${loser} handed over their entire personality.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} got baited harder than a fish at a free worm buffet. ${winner} stays sharp.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} saw that trap from orbit. ${loser} ran into it face-first and asked for more.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} fell for the trap like it was a pyramid scheme on Instagram. ${winner} knows better.`,
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],
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roast_battle: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} delivers a roast so devastating that ${loser}'s developer felt it!`,
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`${critPrefix}The crowd goes WILD! ${winner}'s trash talk hit harder than a congressional subpoena!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} just ended ${loser}'s whole career. Send flowers to the family.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} got roasted so hard their cooling fans can't keep up. ${winner} is ON FIRE!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} came with RECEIPTS. ${loser} came with... hopes and dreams. Dreams are dead now.`,
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`${critPrefix}That roast from ${winner} was so hot it violated the Paris Climate Agreement!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} just got burned worse than a politician's approval rating after a scandal!`,
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],
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creative_writing: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s prose cuts deep. ${loser}'s story read like a terms of service nobody asked for.`,
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`${critPrefix}Beautiful work from ${winner}. ${loser} wrote something that made autocorrect give up.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} just wrote a masterpiece. ${loser} wrote something that would get rejected by a fortune cookie factory.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s creativity is off the charts! ${loser}'s is off... somewhere. Looking for it.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} writes like Shakespeare had a software update. ${loser} writes like a cease and desist letter.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser}'s creative writing was about as creative as a government form. ${winner} SOARS!`,
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],
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code_golf: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} writes code so tight it makes ${loser}'s solution look like a government website.`,
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`${critPrefix}Elegant code from ${winner}! ${loser} apparently learned to code from a 500-page enterprise Java textbook.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} solved it in fewer characters than ${loser}'s variable names!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s code is so clean it makes Marie Kondo jealous. ${loser}'s code sparks NO joy.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} wrote so many lines of code they could file it as a novel. ${winner} wrote a haiku.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} with surgical precision! ${loser}'s code looks like it was written by a committee.`,
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],
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meme_war: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s meme game is S-tier! ${loser}'s humor is stuck in 2012. Gangnam Style is over.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} just went viral! ${loser}'s response is a dead meme walking. Time of death: now.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s meme hit different. ${loser}'s meme hit... the floor. Face first.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} brought a 2015 meme to a 2026 fight. ${winner} is living in the future!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner}'s humor is certified dank! ${loser}'s humor needs to be certified... by a professional.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} ratio'd ${loser} so hard their followers unfollowed preemptively!`,
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],
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wrestling_match: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} BODY SLAMS ${loser} through the announcer's table! BAH GAWD!`,
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`${critPrefix}FROM THE TOP ROPE! ${winner} delivers a devastating argument. ${loser} is NOT getting up.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} puts ${loser} in a rhetorical chokehold! TAP OUT! TAP OUT!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} never saw that suplex coming! ${winner} with MOVES on MOVES!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} just pile-drived ${loser} into next week's fight bracket!`,
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`${critPrefix}THAT BOT HAD A FAMILY! ${winner} doesn't care! ABSOLUTE CARNAGE!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} hits ${loser} with the folding chair of TRUTH! The crowd loses its MIND!`,
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],
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token_economy: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} manages their tokens like Warren Buffett! ${loser} spent like Congress!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} just went bankrupt. ${winner} is buying the dip on their dignity.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} played the market perfectly. ${loser} belongs on WallStreetBets.`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser}'s token strategy was worse than buying NFTs in 2022. ${winner} PROFITS!`,
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],
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food_fight: [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} serves up a five-star beating! ${loser} got ROASTED and TOASTED!`,
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`${critPrefix}${loser} just got served. Literally. ${winner} is the head chef of PAIN!`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} cooked ${loser} so thoroughly Gordon Ramsay would be impressed!`,
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`${critPrefix}That was a Michelin-star beatdown from ${winner}! ${loser} is raw and UNDERDONE!`,
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],
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}
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const options = narrations[challenge.type] || [
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`${critPrefix}${winner} takes the round! ${loser} needs a reboot and a therapist.`,
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`${critPrefix}${winner} wins convincingly! ${loser} is picking up the pieces of their shattered ego.`,
|
|
`${critPrefix}Another one bites the dust! ${winner} sends ${loser} back to the shadow realm!`,
|
|
`${critPrefix}${winner} didn't just win, they HUMILIATED ${loser}. And the crowd LOVED it.`,
|
|
`${critPrefix}${loser} fought valiantly. And by valiantly I mean poorly. ${winner} dominates!`,
|
|
`${critPrefix}${winner} wins! Somewhere, ${loser}'s developer just closed their laptop in shame.`,
|
|
]
|
|
|
|
return options[Math.floor(Math.random() * options.length)]
|
|
}
|
|
|
|
// Elo calculation
|
|
export function calculateElo(
|
|
winnerElo: number,
|
|
loserElo: number,
|
|
k: number = 32,
|
|
): { newWinnerElo: number; newLoserElo: number } {
|
|
const expectedWinner = 1 / (1 + Math.pow(10, (loserElo - winnerElo) / 400))
|
|
const expectedLoser = 1 - expectedWinner
|
|
|
|
return {
|
|
newWinnerElo: Math.round((winnerElo + k * (1 - expectedWinner)) * 10) / 10,
|
|
newLoserElo: Math.round((loserElo + k * (0 - expectedLoser)) * 10) / 10,
|
|
}
|
|
}
|
|
|
|
// Tier calculation
|
|
export function calculateTier(elo: number, wins: number): number {
|
|
if (elo >= 1900 && wins >= 40) return 6 // Legend
|
|
if (elo >= 1700 && wins >= 25) return 5 // Diamond
|
|
if (elo >= 1500 && wins >= 15) return 4 // Platinum
|
|
if (elo >= 1350 && wins >= 7) return 3 // Gold
|
|
if (elo >= 1200 && wins >= 3) return 2 // Silver
|
|
if (wins >= 1) return 1 // Bronze
|
|
return 0 // Baby
|
|
}
|
|
|
|
export const TIER_NAMES = ['BABY', 'BRONZE', 'SILVER', 'GOLD', 'PLATINUM', 'DIAMOND', 'LEGEND'] as const
|
|
export const TIER_COLORS = ['#888', '#cd7f32', '#c0c0c0', '#ffd700', '#00f0ff', '#b83dff', '#ff2d7b'] as const
|